The Cosmic Urge for Self-Awareness
Asking “Who am I?,” we explore a question that is central not only to our spiritual journey but to the very essence of existence itself. This sacred inquiry draws us beyond the superficial layers of our lives into the boundless depths of our True Nature, unconfined by time, space, or identity. Insights arising from meditation are not mere personal achievements; they are gifts from Life itself, revealing the transpersonal nature of Self-Inquiry. Supreme Consciousness (expressed as “That,” sama rasa, the “same taste,” and the Light in everything), discovers itself through its conscious manifestations. Therefore, cosmic Self-awareness reveals itself through the timeless question “Who am I?”
The inquiry “Who am I?” is not about finding an answer but about dissolving the question itself into the realization of our divine essence.
It’s an eternal pilgrimage, each moment inviting us back home to the Heart. We should remember the cosmic meaning in such insights—that the profound simplicity and peace of our essential being is the essence of all Life, sama rasa.
Life Looks for Self-Awareness
In the grand cosmic quest of Life looking to know itself, the question “Who am I?” appears not as basic intellectual curiosity but as an inner calling, the intrinsic impulse of Life itself. Life, in its boundless expression, seeks love, beauty, meaning, and understanding. For example, the Cosmos doesn’t have to be beautiful, yet it is. Beauty is not just an addition, an ornament to Creation. It is rooted in the ultimate, divine, fundamental ground, following an ontological longing.
Ramana Maharshi said: “The only true and full awareness is awareness of awareness. Till awareness is awareness of itself, it knows no peace at all.” (Sri Muruganar, The Garland of Guru’s Sayings)
Life is restless until acknowledged in its deepest essence.
The inquiry “Who am I?” is to be lived—really lived, fully embraced with our whole being. In truly living this question, we become the living answer.
This inquiry is a continual unfolding, an ever-deepening understanding that what we search for is not outside us but is our very essence. This divine Life that animates us is the breath of the Cosmos itself.
Therefore, in this exploration, the ultimate question, “Who am I?,” transforms from what seems to be just a query into a living principle, a dynamic stillness continually revealing itself in every aspect of life.
It is not about seeking an ecstatic state, but an ongoing revelation of life as it is—our natural, undivided being.
In this recognition, every moment is an opportunity to witness the dissolution of old patterns and the spontaneous emergence of life, unmediated and pure.
Even outside of formal practice, Self-Inquiry often surfaces spontaneously in times of intense emotion, acute longing, or existential crisis—moments when Life beckons us to look beyond the superficial layers of our existence.
Why Do People Tend to Avoid Self-Awareness?
Why, then, do humans often ignore or turn away from this profound inquiry?
It is primarily because plunging into “Who am I?” suggests a potential dissolution of the ego, the “me” we have meticulously constructed—our personality, social status, opinions, and the myriad identities we cling to: the boasting of our ego or our depressions and dramas.
The avoidance of Self-Inquiry, paradoxically, stems from a deep-seated intuition that to truly question is to let go of who we think we are. Yet, or maybe exactly because of this, we hesitate, overwhelmed by the magnitude of the question, unsure of how to engage with it and its consequences authentically.
Challenging the Very Center from Which We Operate
Genuine Self-Inquiry requires the courage to acknowledge our avoidance and face the discomfort of not knowing with the mind. We also must brave all the potential disruptions to our social life and worldly status that such a shift of perspective could bring.
Self-Inquiry involves recognizing that we engage in habitual activities (accumulating knowledge or wealth, engaging in various distractions, etc.— which ultimately lead to busyness and escapism) to shield ourselves from personal, existential emptiness.
To ask “Who am I?” sincerely is to challenge the very center from which we function; it means to investigate the one who investigates. It is a noble task and a responsibility we owe to Life.
Not Relying on Memory or Intelligence
Unlike ordinary questions that seek answers from the realm of memory and experience, the inquiry into “Who am I?” transcends these faculties.
Here, memory or intelligence cannot assist, for what we are seeking is not relative but absolute. This questioning brings us to a threshold beyond concepts where the mind’s impetuous activities end.
The Beginning of a Sacred Quest—Bringing the Question to a Deeper Level
When we reach the last horizon of the mind, philosophers might suggest that this is the journey’s end. However, in Jnana Yoga, diving beyond the threshold of the mind doesn’t mean the cessation of inquiry, but the very beginning of the real, sacred quest.
When the mind stops and our outward searching and critical psychological examinations still, in surrender, we encounter a profound shift. The transition from a conceptual not-knowing to the living experience of who we really are begins from this openness to wonderment, this abandonment to the ineffable.
It is here that we experience a radical openness—transparency to the ineffable, to God, beyond any concepts, the “Cloud of Unknowing.” In this state, our attention no longer projects outward, and not even inward, but rests in a vibrant stillness, a multi-dimensional, peaceful alertness where the “I” and Life are indistinguishable, cosmic spanda. And, there is total faith in what Is and Love.
Living in this openness doesn’t imply a withdrawal from the world but a deeper intimate engagement with it.
With Love,
Sahajananda
Sahajananda is the principal founder of Hridaya Yoga. You can read more of his contemplations here.
