49 Day Silent Meditation Hridaya Yoga

All Life Is Sacred: A Reflection on the 49-Day Silent Meditation Retreat

By Beata Kucienska

“Where is the door to sacredness?,” I asked the Heart.

The answer came when I was watching some birds during a sunset walk: “Sacredness is the simplicity of life.”

During the 49-Day Silent Meditation Retreat, I often had the feeling that sacredness was just a breath away… waiting for me with infinite patience. Every moment was a bottomless well… and it was up to me how deep I would dive. I was not in a hurry. I had all the time in the world to listen to the Heart. I knew that the magic would happen. And it did. One night, the waves of mystery touched my toes and sang:

Let go your burdens
Let go your worries
Surrender
And follow me
I will guide you there

Suddenly, the Earth embraced my feet and the birds became love turned into music. And I felt that I was in the most beautiful place in the world.

Every day the mind brought its usual stories. Every day the Heart called me to surrender. I knew that Beauty was waiting for me.

I listened deeply. I asked for guidance. I was longing for sacredness so much. In moments of grace, I tasted it… and then, I longed again…

My conception of meditation changed. It was no longer sitting with the back straight and the eyes closed. Life became meditation. Nature became my teacher.

Back in Samsara

“I
tried painting
But it was easier to fly slicing
potatoes.”
–Rabia Basri

Now, having returned to “normal life,” I often get lost in thoughts and activities. Then, the pain comes. I know that beauty is ever-present, but clouds cover my eyes and I cannot see it. And, it feels as if I were wasting these precious moments, these unique jewels of life. It hurts, but even this pain is made of grace.

 
49 Day Silent Meditation RetreatOnce you experience the depth of life, you can’t forget it. Swimming in shallow water is not enough anymore. It breaks your heart not to feel the sacredness of every moment. And, you allow your heart to be broken. You learn to be grateful for this pain and longing. You want to feel this wound even deeper, as it guides you along the golden thread into the Kingdom of the Heart.

You realize that everything you do in life is driven by the longing to feel sacredness again—because it is the only thing that matters. When the hour of death comes, you will clearly see that all the sacred moments of depth and connection make life worth living. Deep inside, you already know it, since tasting sacredness is facing death. And, facing death is diving into the fullness of life.
 

It is there… in the touch of a lover, the song of a bird, the smile of a child, the trembling of a leaf, the purring of a cat. Omnipresent in the simplicity of life, patiently waiting for you, sending you secret messages in every little moment. Your destiny is to experience it constantly. Your life is meant to be sacred.

Stillness
It is so delicate
Behind the clouds of the mind
there is an immense clarity
great softness
lost innocence
a wonderland vibrating with Life

People are looking for life
in gatherings, multiplication, and noise
in “more and more,”
But the Heart of Life
is in deep silence
in “less and less”

Where thoughts end
unspoken beauty begins

 
 
Beata is a Hridaya Yoga teacher who has participated in two 49-Day Prathyabhijna Retreats. She is also a frequent contributor to our blog. You can read all her posts here.

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